ARE U A "PRACTICE WIFE"

Men are straight forward beings. They’re not really into verbal manipulation and double meanings. So girlfriend, if you are dating a man and he very plainly tells you that he doesn’t want to get married, let me CONFIRM, he doesn’t want to get married and he’s not waiting for you to try and change his mind.com It’s easy to cling to the hope that maybe he just doesn’t want to get married "right now" while you continue to get emotionally invested. Maybe after two or three years together he will suddenly change his mind, you think.no really.. you think? Ask any married men about their wives and the first time they met them. Usually the memory is recalled with a smile and a mention of “just knowing” she was the one. I’ve yet to have a guy friend tell me he firmly told his wife he didn’t want to get married but she hung around anyway and wore down his resistance. Another instance that causes much confusion in the smitten hearts of women is the man who solemnly swears to never marry… then marries the next girl he goes out with. DONT U FEEL STUPID...well you look stupid too..lol The problem here is the incomplete sentence. When a man gives you the “I don’t want to get married” line and quietly finishes his sentence in his head, perhaps you should have done the same! (together) “I don’t want to get married ??? yep go ahead and say it, TO YOU"..lol its really not funny but at some point you had to catch that memo. YOU just didn't repeat it to yourself as many times as needed to make it firmly sink in. Ouch. sorry,I know. It happens to the best of us. But it’s better to take his statement at face value in which it was intended than to dwell in the land of “maybe he’ll change his mind”. Next time you hear this statement don’t get offended at his honesty but also don’t go into denial that he just hasn’t experienced fully your mind blowing pussy either.( yeah, because yours is the best he ever had) Graciously and sincerely state you have different long term plans pick up your face and go. BUT HOLD UP, there is just one little problem, you've committed to this thing girl. you've made plans, invested in a year lease twice, you're cooking, cleaning, playing house (as the old folk say), "shacking". Do you leave, Do you stay? Well if you stay its important that you know who you are and of course, he's not going to tell you that.. so I will! "A practice wife" yep, that's you BOO! she is the woman a man dates right before he decides to or while waiting for the perfect time to and person to whom he wants to settle down with. You live together, you’re loving, but for some reason he’s not eager to go down the aisle. If this sounds like your relationship, read on for a few telltale signs. If you find that most of them are true, chances are he’s almost prime and ready to walk down the aisle — just not with you. Real Quick(cause I know you're getting mad)Big thanks to MadameNoire for theses amazing references. so, You’re Living Together And there’s no end in sight. You’re going through the motions like a married couple, but he never talks about making it official. You’ve Had A Lot of Problems He used to come home late, not clean up behind himself and spend too much time with his boys. Now he’s the perfect man — and you’re a nag for getting him there. He may just quit his arguing ex and move on to marry the next chick who never complains — because you taught him how living with a woman works. lol.Sometimes being ready to get married has a lot to do with age.(listen at yourself honey) In his early 20s or 30s he’ll still be satisfied with playing house. When you’re finally tired of his lack of commitment, he’ll be older, wiser and ready to settle down. Sometimes a practice wife comes with a practice kid. He may be trying out family responsibility with you to prepare to father a real family later on. His Friends Are All Married too. It’s another sign that he’s the marrying kind. You’re just not the wife he had in mind. If your relationship is on the rocks, he’ll be ready to join his friends in matrimony the next time he settles down. He Treats You Like His Wife. You share bills, share responsibilities and share a house. It just doesn’t seem like you’re working toward anything because you're not!. His Friend Don’t Take You Seriously You’ve been together for two years and living together for one. But not one of his friends cracks the usual “when are you two going to get married” jokes. That’s because, in private, he’s already let them know that he doesn’t see a wedding with you in his future. He’s Focused on His Paper He’s not in a financial position to get married right now.( that's what they all say) So a practice wife makes sense.( yeah YOU) Now he’s heading straight to the top of his game while your relationship is falling apart. When it’s all said and done, he’ll be ready for a real wife to go with his real career.. real soon! Look at you, cause he is..You’ve Got More Baggage Than He Does It’s a hard truth, but lots of men are only willing to get married when they feel like they’re upgrading. (are u the upgrade bag lady?)If you’ve got kids and lots of debt and he has neither, he may be waiting to put a ring on a woman with less on her plate. and if reality hasn't set in yet, REMEMBER,His Mother Doesn’t Like You. He may think you’re marriage material, but if his family doesn’t agree he’s unlikely to put a ring on it. You’ll just keep spinning your wheels until you give him an ultimatum and he has to show you the door. Now that he’s learned his lesson, he’ll make sure his mother likes his next girl so he feels comfortable walking down the aisle. Lets pause for a moment because I know that's a lot to take in. Now lets be honest, If things do not seem to be going anywhere, or if the subject of marriage hasn’t even been brought up at any point within almost a decade of seeing each other or living together, then you can most likely bet that he’s just dragging you along the convenience ride for sure. Men are programmed to achieve end results. If a man wants to marry you, he will make it happen. but keep in mind the ladder too. In the mean time lets take sometime and reevaluate ourselves, and how we are being perceived. Are we wasting time? Are we coming of pressed or needy? Swallow this pill ladies, make the necessary changes and consider this a lesson learned. Reality is the winner.

It's more than A Religion, It's A RELATIONSHIP

I believe that God wants to have a relationship with everyone on earth and to see them come to salvation.BUT, I don't believe in religion. I am not religious. Now don't get me wrong. There are lots of great religious men and women doing fabulous things: building communities of believers that love God, serving their fellow man, advancing the kingdom of God, all that stuff. But religion is not God. It is merely a system of beliefs advocated by those who do their best (in most cases) to adhere to the principles of scripture. Even Christianity is about people and made up of people. In that sense, it is highly fallible.OMG LATOYA , why do you say that ?Because people love to be part of something. I love to be part of something. Being a part of something bigger than the self helps to give life meaning. Christianity and the activities and ministry of the local church helps to add meaning to the lives of many people. But it also distracts them sometimes from the real purpose of our existence. God created us for relationship. He wants to walk with us, talk with us, help us to learn and grow. We are spiritual beings, created to know God. One of the problems I see with Christianity as a religion is that it takes its focus off of the relationship and puts it onto the "lifestyle" of Christians. There is a Christian lifestyle - common dos and don'ts, ways of talking and behaving, an expected political outlook - and unfortunately, a common critical eye towards those who believe differently and act differently. In this I find the biggest fault with Christianity - the focus on sin, both personal sin and the sin of others. Jesus Christ did not come and die on the cross to get us to stop sinning. He came to set us free from sin. He came, not to put our focus on sin, but to take our focus off of it. God wants our focus to be on Him, not on the rules. I don't lay down a law against my wife. We have a relationship, we love each other, and learn and grow together. Rules don't make that relationship work, love does. God wants the same thing to be true with the relationship He has with us. He wants it to be about love, not sin, not punishment, not getting it right every time, but learning and moving forward. "And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love." (1 Cor 13:13) Love is mankind's greatest motivator. If anything stirs the heart of man, it is the desire for love. You see it everywhere - movies, books, music, poetry, art. We were made for relationship, and the beginning of any successful relationship is God. So does God want us to sin? Absolutely not. The wages of sin is death. It hurts us dreadfully to sin. But God wants us to be able to let it go and move on. He wants to lead us out of sin as we commune with Him in a love relationship - not because we are fearful of hell or the criticism of fellow Christians. God wants to teach us to avoid sin because it is an assault on the relationship He has with us and because it is an assault on life itself. God has good plans for us and sin prevents Him from leading us into that blessing. Sin is the choice to do something our way, contrary to the leadership of God. God is the author of life and knows what it takes to provide for life. Sin produces death because it is contrary to God and to His wisdom. Follow God and live - that message is everywhere in the bible. We often sin because we hurt. All people need love, acceptance, and leadership. God promises to meet all of those needs through the Sprit - He is our comfort (love), provides fellowship (acceptance), and offers counsel (leadership). When we connect with God, we can receive all of these things and be made whole. Our hearts can be filled, so to speak. When we are disconnected from God, our hearts become empty. It's at this time that we often turn to sin as a remedy for the pain of an empty heart. Only the love of God can fill an empty heart. Sin is man's attempt to fill his own heart; to find a little relief; to escape the pain of life. As we grow in our relationship with God, we learn how to recognize when we are disconnected from God by the desire for sin that sometimes rises within. We can sense our own "heart level" and use that nudge to step back into fellowship with God. So why did Israel have the law? The bible says in Gal 3:19 that it was "added because of transgressions till the Seed should come." And in verse 24 that it "was our tutor to bring us to Christ." Like a child needs rules and laws provided by the parents for protection - Israel needed those laws because they had very little love for God and weren't interested in pursuing a relationship with Him. God made a promise to Abraham (Gen 22:18) that He intended to keep. Specifically, God promised that from Abraham's descendents a savior would come that would bless the entire world. Israel was the promised vessel through which Jesus Christ would come. If Israel didn't follow God, like so many other ancient nations, they would cease to exist. God gave them the law to protect them and hence His ability to keep His promise to Abraham. He didn't give the law to other nations and He doesn't give the law to us. The law was not God's wish - it was added because of Israel's sin. God has no love for the law. The law had a purpose; that purpose has been fulfilled - Christ has come. Our job on earth is to reach the lost. Legalism prevents us from doing so and focuses us on the sin of others rather than on ways to love them. Commenting or pointing out the sin of others never led them to Christ. Its love that draws people, not condemnation, not the fear of hell. Have a relationship with someone, find out what moves them, get interested in that. If you want to save them - love them. The Holy Spirit is already convicting them of their sin and you'll have opportunities to teach them as they grow in their relationship with God and learn to listen to the Holy Spirit. We are called to exhort, edify, and comfort (1 Cor 14:3) - not criticize.